NEWS
Prince William revealed Lilibet’s DNA test results, prompting applause from the entire royal family: “I deeply regret to announce that Lilibet is the biological daughter of…” See more below
Prince William revealed Lilibet’s DNA test results, prompting applause from the entire royal family: “I deeply regret to announce that Lilibet is the biological daughter of…” See more below
**Prince William Reveals Shocking DNA Results of Princess Lilibet – Royal Family Reacts with Applause and Gasps**
*London, June 9, 2025* — In an astonishing twist worthy of a Netflix docudrama, Prince William reportedly revealed the long-rumored DNA test results of Princess Lilibet Diana during a private royal gathering at Balmoral Castle this week.
According to a source who spoke under strict anonymity (and probably shouldn’t have), the prince stood up during dinner, cleared his throat dramatically, and said, “I deeply regret to announce that Lilibet is the biological daughter of…” He paused for effect. The entire room froze.
Then came the punchline:
**“…Sir David Attenborough.”**
A moment of stunned silence followed — quickly broken by thunderous applause, polite chuckles, and Queen Camilla dropping her teacup in disbelief. King Charles reportedly muttered, “Well, that would explain her calm demeanor and deep interest in hedgehogs.”
### The Alleged DNA Report
Though no documents have been publicly released (because they definitely don’t exist), royal insiders claim the “DNA test” was conducted as part of a heritage-themed episode of *Who’s Your Royal Daddy?*, a fictional spinoff to *The Crown* that’s being pitched to Netflix executives.
“Lilibet’s poise, intelligence, and affinity for documentaries on ecosystems make total sense now,” said an anonymous palace butler who claims to have overheard the whole conversation while dusting antique corgi figurines.
### Meghan and Harry React
When reached for comment at their Montecito mansion, Meghan Markle allegedly laughed for a full 3 minutes before responding, “Wait, are we still pretending this is real? Because if so, I want Oprah to narrate the next reveal.”
Prince Harry, when told about the news, reportedly said, “Honestly, I was just relieved it wasn’t James Corden.”
### Buckingham Palace Statement
In response to global curiosity, Buckingham Palace released a brief, tongue-in-cheek statement:
> *“We can neither confirm nor deny the alleged involvement of Sir David Attenborough in the Royal DNA lineage. However, we do wish to thank him for his lifelong service to planet Earth and now, possibly, the House of Windsor.”*
Sir David, 98, responded via Twitter with a single, cryptic emoji:
MAJOR BREAKING: Supreme Court Rejects Trump’s Tariff Authority — Here’s What It Means:
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The Epstein Regime just put up a giant Trump banner on the Department of Justice building.
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DAMN. Trump fell fast asleep and risked falling out of his chair — at his own “Board of Peace” meeting. He is absolutely humiliating himself on the world stage. Trump does not have the stamina to lead anything — not a board for peace, and certainly not the United States of America.
TAYLOR SWIFT JUST DECLARED TRUMP UNFIT FOR OFFICE LIVE ON TV: “HE IS FORCING AMERICANS TO MAKE HORRID DECISIONS THEY NEVER SIGNED UP FOR — THIS MAN IS DESTROYING OUR COUNTRY FOREVER.” The audience expected prepared remarks. What they got was a woman trembling with urgency. On live television, Taylor Swift declared: “If Trump remains in power, we are no longer a nation — we are enemies within our own homes — Audience Left Stunned! You won’t believe how Trump responded Just 5 sentence one word… 👀 Watch before this gets taken down!
BREAKING🚨 Republican Thomas Massie says he will publicly read Epstein client list names if Attorney General Pam Bondi’s Department of Justice continues to refuse to release them.
TRUMP ERUPTS as MASSIVE IMPEACHMENT PROTESTS FLOOD the U.S. Nationwide protests demanding Trump’s impeachment have exploded from D.C. to L.A., with huge crowds chanting for accountability amid mounting scandals.
