NFL
GAMEDAY: Chiefs face Cardinals in first preseason game of 2025
GAMEDAY: Chiefs face Cardinals in first preseason game of 2025
**BREAKING: Chiefs to Play Cardinals on Mars in First Preseason Game of 2025**
**KANSAS CITY, MO** — In a shocking twist that has rocked the sports world and baffled NASA officials, the Kansas City Chiefs are set to face the Arizona Cardinals in the first preseason game of 2025 — **on the surface of Mars**.
The game, originally scheduled for State Farm Stadium, was inexplicably relocated after Chiefs head coach Andy Reid reportedly “wanted to spice things up” and “test Mahomes’ arm in low gravity.”
“We’ve already won a few Super Bowls on Earth,” said Reid in a press conference while sipping Tang through a space helmet. “Time to conquer the cosmos.”
### Mahomes to Throw 300-Yard Passes?
Quarterback Patrick Mahomes, equipped with a specially designed helmet that reads defensive schemes in Martian dust storms, appeared excited for the challenge.
“I’ve always wanted to throw a football into orbit,” Mahomes said. “And I’m pretty sure the Martian secondary can’t cover Kelce.”
Meanwhile, Travis Kelce has been hard at work learning the native dances of Mars in preparation for touchdown celebrations. “The Griddy is out. I’m bringing in the Red Rock Shuffle,” he said, surrounded by a group of confused astronauts.
### Cardinals “Totally Ready” After Watching *The Martian* Twice
The Arizona Cardinals, not to be outdone, have reportedly trained for this game by watching *The Martian* twice and purchasing a used SpaceX shuttle off eBay.
“We’re good,” said new Cardinals head coach, who has requested anonymity after accidentally referring to Venus as “Mars’ cousin.” “Altitude’s no problem. We’ve practiced without oxygen.”
### Key Concerns:
* The coin toss may drift into the stratosphere.
* Timeouts will be delayed 15 minutes due to lag in communication with Earth.
* Martian soil may interfere with Gatorade absorption.
Despite these challenges, NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell expressed support: “This is the kind of interplanetary expansion we’ve been waiting for. Football is universal — even if there’s no atmosphere.”
### Kickoff at 3:30 ET / 1 Sol Martian Time
Fans on Earth can tune in to the broadcast via ESPN 9: Intergalactic Edition. The halftime show will feature Elon Musk and a hologram of Vince Lombardi performing a duet of “Rocket Man.”
No word yet on whether season ticket holders will be reimbursed for the cost of interplanetary travel.
The best and worst WAG looks Taylor Swift wore to Chiefs games this season, but she didn’t come alone booed by the cardinal fans, is that a baby Bump? Her response leaves thousands in shock ⤵️
Taylor Swift Finally Arrives in a Stunning Display at Cardinals vs. Chiefs Game to Support Boyfriend Travis Kelce – But She Didn’t Come Alone… Booed by Cardinals Fans, and Is That a Baby Bump?! Her Response Leaves Thousands in Shock as New Photos Spark a Massive Frenzy
2 Kansas City Chiefs defensive contributors exit preseason game vs. Arizona Cardinals with injuries ⤵️
BREAKING: See how Patrick Mahomes went viral by completing the blindfolded QB challenge at Chiefs training camp.
Mahomes out here painting masterpieces, this one’s signed, sealed & delivered to Jason Brownlee
GAMEDAY: Chiefs face Cardinals in first preseason game of 2025
Legendary singer Celine Dion was rushed to the ICU in Montreal overnight after a sudden, critical downturn in her health — marked by severe fatigue, breathing difficulty, and full-body muscle stiffness from Stiff Person Syndrome. Her family flew in urgently, and the hospital sealed off an entire floor. But it was one whispered sentence from her sister Claudette at Celine’s unconscious bedside — a message of love and surrender — that became the detail bringing the world to tears………………….See below
HEARTBREAKING UPDATE! Elon Musk shares emotional news about his mother Maye Musk’s health, his mother’s battle with cancer. Sending shockwaves through the tech world. See more comment.
At 75, King Charles could no longer bear the weight of a 30-year secret about Diana’s death. With a weary, lined face, he confessed to William about the one who cut the seatbelt that night — driven by love… and by hate. “I’m sorry, my boy… it wasn’t an accident. Your mother…” The rest of his words were swallowed by silence — but the truth could tear the royal family apart….. SEE MORE BELOW
“‘For My Son’ — Diana’s Secret Letter Revealed, Changing the World’s Perception of Harry. He Tearfully Reads His Mother’s Words, Stunned to Discover a Hidden DNA Result. A Message From Beyond Leaves Harry Shocked About His Royal Title”…. SEE MORE BELOW
“25 years is too long to stay silent…” — The surgeon who tried to save Diana — and once loved her — told William her final words: “I love my two sons so much.” With remorse, he revealed Diana’s last handwritten note… one that could change everything…. SEE MORE BELOW
